Michelle goes to Russia: don't call it a homecoming

In light of past assertions that Michelle Obama is a Marxist, especially those published on this site, TheRightFieldLine, in this post, offers some helpful suggestions on what she should not say while in Russia.

"I feel so at home here."

"The architecture is so leveling. By the time we leave the White House, I hope America will look like this."

"I think the czar's idea of Potemkin villages was brilliant. We're going to arrange for villages just like that on strips that have been boarded up because of the recession. In fact, we're going to have a Potemkin Village stimulus bill soon."

"When we flew into Washington for the inauguration it reminded me of Vladimir Lenin arriving on a train at the Finland Station in 1917."

"I'm fascinated by the way Russia treated dissidents. Free room and board. No pesky visitors. Frequent confessions. Is there any chance you'd share some of the insights you gained from that process?"

"Mr. Putin, it's as if we're opposites. Everybody likes us, but nobody is afraid of us. Nobody likes you, but everybody is afraid of you. How can we make people at least a little bit afraid of us?"

"Num chucks? No, we can't carry num chucks. They're illegal in lots of places in the United States. Of course, we could try to get those laws repealed, or struck down by the Supreme Court."

There is one thing Michelle Obama should say in Russia: "Mr. Putin, the average life expectancy in Russia is 59. The only people who die at 59 In the United States are those who vote the wrong way in Chicago."